Food and Sex

I wish I had a Tempurpedic, so that I could place food on my bed next to me without worrying about a spill. I like eating on my bed because it is a comfortable location in which it is socially acceptable to be nude. If you are naked anywhere else, and someone sees you, they will be like "What the fuck?"--unless they were a dirty hippie, in which case they would hit on me and suggest some sort of "gang bang" and then I would have to kill him because I am NOT a homosexual-- Except in the bathroom. But that's not a good place to eat. 

Have you ever tried eating while having sex? I haven't. I would think it to be phenomenal, since it combines the two best things in the world. What do people really live for, aside from eating and sexing? 

Here is a list of the best foods in the world:

• BACON
• fried chicken
• sirloin steak (extra rare. there has to be blood)
• lunchables
• babies*

*You may think it is wrong to eat babies, but think of it this way: if you are eating them while having sex then its ok because its like recycling. Just be sure to ditch the condom. I personally would not use a condom so that my partner could get pregnant, so that the bitch can have an abortion. Then I could really feast.

Gay Marriage

A popular topic in today's culture is whether or not the gays should be allowed to marry. Gay marriage is legal in six states. The question to ask is, how will this affect us? The gays think that it won't affect anyone but themselves. They think that they can just live their gay little lives with their gay partners and shove it all in our face, as if their proud of it--They prance around like little sissy-faeries and bend over for anyone who asks. If you ask me, I'd say they're a bunch of sluts--And they think that we won't care. Want to know what I think? I think it will affect the whole world. Hasn't anyone seen the Butterfly Effect? I think that gay people are gross and they have AIDS. Know what I think about that? Good. It's all for the better. I hope that they all get AIDS and die. And they should have to marry to the opposite gender so that they spread AIDS and kill them, too. They're partners deserve it for marrying a gay.